1. |
||||
I spent yet another night copying poems into frames so that she can hang them on her tongue and teeth and bear them when she bites or smiles. They fit nicely between the crest of her lips and the minarets of her words. Rising and crashing back down with each inflection, the meter invites life to slip back into her throat and kiss her from the inside out. Deeper than I ever really could.
But the lines were not drawn level. Something is off. Her teeth are wearing green with an ugly blush of patina. Her tongue flies wildly in her mouth, rapping at the chamber door beneath the crook of my nose for more of the guilty promises I dressed ravishingly to rival the gallants from her favorite childhood stories. She beats her fists purple while I watch from behind the bulwark and laugh at the tears welling up in the bags under my eyes.
They say that words can't bite like nails but I've seen suns come to be and die again in a passing breath. Sentences like portraits capture the decline of the southern aristocracy, the thinning of the Grecian blood, or the collapse of the bay waters into the shore with an efficacy that seems divinely inspired. Or, at least, inspired in poetastry.
So that she may rest again, like a child would, I will heed the words of an old poet now silent like his poem in that solitude. At once: we are Being Still. Following are the words left for those who clamor for the works of a man stricken dead by the slight of his own pen.
|
||||
2. |
Let the Right One In
05:23
|
|||
She is the bluest light
I know this from a love that’s been taught
I can’t get her out of my sight
The beauty she’s flaunting is haunting, it’s taunting me
I’m just a prisoner to insecurity and made her a prisoner of an undying love
I’m ruined; haven’t you just had enough?
Scattered out of focus lights
Keep me from seeing
Everything that I missed
An image that will break my heart tonight
And in the afterlife
I’ll find you faster, love of mine
I’ll be right by your side
There will be no need
To say goodbye
Forever connected
With your blood on my lips
The taste gets sweeter
With each and every kiss
Soul mates
Our love will shine as bright
As scattered out of focus lights
Scattered out of focus lights
Keep me from seeing
Everything that I missed
An image that will break my heart tonight
Let the right one in
Scattered out of focus lights
Keep me from seeing
Everything that I missed
An image that will break my heart tonight
(Let the right one in)
|
||||
3. |
Murder In Baltimore
07:48
|
|||
Help somebody there's been a Murder in Baltimore
It came to this
Over a conflict of identity and self respect
There's only room for one
His thoughts to do harm
Ran deep but their words to cure cut fatal
Til they dug between his shoulder blades
And made his gait unstable
So he cracked at the knees to echo
Cassandra's providence of the coming collapse
To be a staple in the woodwork
Nothing more than a fly on the wall
Of a well lit room with a lone window looking in
But his eyes still scream
Where have I been
Flee the scene it's flooding, holy hell it's bloody
Avert your eyes and steel your ears
Twenty wasted years
Count the breaths in seconds
The beating of my pulse rings hollow
I thought you would be here
Just ask me if I'm fine
The cliff is steep and sheer
Would I be wasting all your time
Help somebody there's been a Murder in Baltimore
It came to this
Because you couldn't reconcile yourselves
Can you call it suicide if you don't know the person that you killed?
There's nothing to say when the only thing between the preacher and the choir is a mirror
And maybe if we're born as ghosts we're not supposed to die whole
|
||||
4. |
Winter Scene
06:02
|
|||
Suddenly the snow doesn’t seem so beautiful
Now that it’s covered in blood
He said this is not what I wanted to do
But it has to be done
Death is no angel
Plagued by nightmares of things I can’t believe
Haunted by visions of that winter scene
A lifeless body on the ground
Could that be me
His blood's on my hands
You’re guilty, you’re guilty
Father stop I’m begging you please
The doctor said there might be some hope for me
Like I’d believe his mouth full of lies
Telling me everything will be all right
Telling me everything will be alright
Telling me everything will be just fine
Memories are probably the saddest thing about my life. Not that I regret anything, or I didn’t enjoy myself, but knowing I can never go back. I can never feel what I felt in those moments passed, good or bad. Paying no attention to how much time I had, or how fast it was passing me by. I would lie awake late at night feeling choked by the ceiling, wishing I could just see the sky. Wondering about the future, feeling sick about the past. And no matter how much time does pass, I never feel whole. Never okay with what I’ve accomplished year after year. I still lie awake every night. Still choking. Still waiting for change. To feel whole. And at this point, I don’t think it will ever come. At this point, I think I’ve given up.
Please don’t do this
You’re sick
And I won’t wait to lose another
I won’t go through this again
It was the same with your mother
It’s happening right before my eyes
And I can’t sit still
If I don’t kill you now I know the cancer will
And I won’t wait for answers from an uncaring doctor
The unknown is unbearable
It’s not enough
And I won’t pray for answers from a faulty God
I’m ending this tonight
I’ve lost too much
I’m bleeding out in slow motion
Neurons fire off like explosions
My thoughts flooding me with emotion
But I accept my fate as I fade away
Accept my fate as I fade away
Father stop I’m begging you please
The doctor said there might be some hope for me
Like I’d believe his mouth full of lies
Telling me everything will be all right
Telling me everything will be alright
Telling me everything will be just fine
|
||||
5. |
||||
Lay your body down for the count
(I'll never have this)
Your sacrilege is saccharine
(I'll never taste this again)
We're buying our time but we spend it on arguments
You splinter your spine
Look up, down, reflect, repent
Caught by the wrist, compressed by the gravity
We hang right here
I woke up that day near sunrise grasping at the sheets for something that wasn't there. You had already left them. Your hair obscured your face from me like a memory that isn't quite mine but I knew your eyes were passing along the windowsill, tasting thoughts on your tongue. Yet all I could see from that pathetically comfortable temple we called a bed was your back pressed like Atlas under the slight weight of your shoulders. And you were tracing the footsteps of the kids across the street. So I went back to bed.
I couldn't handle a poetic moment that early in the morning.
So is this what we are?
Hands shaking and blue hearts refuse
What does a dead sacrament mean to you?
When the lights went out, did you lose your eyes?
(Or just take mine?)
Or just take mine?
(Let's face our convenient lie)
And a glance is too cheap
To afford what we speak
I'm tasting sour in sweet
Is this the last of our love at our feet
Or just the rest of your feathers?
Is this all gone forever?
(Kyle:)
We were dancing in circles in churches, we fell
Your body, it clutched into mine
From hearts, my belly, your torso, to wine
Count backwards from seven to slow dive
Before we die
Before we die
Carry my body, deliver me
Tearing roots from the ground, you coquettish hound
Don't you ever forget who brought you to sleep
Press the air
Out of your lungs and tear our your hair
Broken bruise
Sleep is a dream in a bluesy key
I dispose my fear
I've interred my love under boxed wine and diner food
Soft, mute, and motionless
I hope I'm ready to let go
A waltz is supposed to wake the body
Not shake it in apathy
Maybe I just heard it wrong
Well I guess I'll accept whatever I'm left with
That's easy to swallow
And I won't forget
If you don't believe
That letting this go
Was a choice that I made
|
||||
6. |
Haunter Pt. 1
02:47
|
|||
I’ve been watching you while you sleep
In hopes that you’ll wake to find me
In hopes that we could speak
I will follow my hope blindly
In the afterlife we will meet
Don’t ever stop trying to find me
I’ve been watching you while you sleep
I will follow my love blindly
|
Sander Hollow Ocean City, New Jersey
Sander Hollow, formally known as Being Still, is a post-hardcore band consisting of drummer/vocalist Joey Lucarine and guitarist/vocalist John Saporita. Sander Hollow is a culmination of sounds inspired by bands such as Dance Gavin Dance, A Lot Like Birds, and Tiny Moving Parts. ... more
Streaming and Download help
Sander Hollow recommends:
If you like Sander Hollow, you may also like:
Bandcamp Daily your guide to the world of Bandcamp